harlii.ol.day

When I think back to my early childhood, around 3 or 4 years old, the happy moments that should come to mind—the laughter, the warmth of a family together—are absent. Instead, what remains are fragmented memories filled with tension, arguments, and a deep sense of unease. I can’t recall simple moments of joy with my mom, dad, brother, and me, all together. What I do remember is the sound of raised voices, the feeling of walking on eggshells, and the ever-present weight of something being wrong. My mom was always working, doing everything she could to hold things together, while my dad seemed to slip further into his own world, numbed by alcohol. I can’t remember a single time when my dad wasn’t drinking, and I can’t picture my mom ever being fully relaxed. They both seemed trapped in their own struggles—my dad with his addiction, my mom with the burden of trying to make it all work. And my brother and I? We were just there, caught in the middle of it all, too young to understand but ol...

One of the reason why people get so sentimental. it's because, memories are the the only thing that don't change. When everything else does. There are things in life that can't hold on forever, no matter how much you fight for it. Some isn't always good, it becomes playful.  When you met someone you learned to love, you thought it was destiny who made your paths cross, but what if making your paths cross is just part of the game that the playful destiny create? making you realize in the end that the person you thought that was destined for you wasn't really meant to stay, but only destined to make you feel love and leave you when you've already fallen.  It's not easy to sate a reason when you decide to leave your love. Some might think its it's just an excuse, some might not actually believe, some will blame you, some might even get mad at you, that they don't see is the fact that it hurts you even more to hurt someone who doesn...

It’s depressing! They make me want to sit with them and talk. It just really makes me think about life. Either they had someone and lost them or they just never did. Stories could be amazing even though they maybe be heartbreaking. It’s amazing to know how they feel about their daily life and feelings. I’m sure they think about it everyday. I know I would. Honestly, I’m scared to death that I could be one them and be lonely. I’d love to share most of my life with a significant other. I’d love a reason to live everyday. I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s scared though.   This is heart-breaking. ;(

What is something that is “going right” in your life?    Nothing is going perfectly right.  :/ Do you often have a lot on your mind?  Always. Do you ever talk to yourself? Not like, out loud lol.  Does it bother you when people are not on time? Yes. Did you see your bestfriend today? I don’t even know who that is anymore, to be honest. Have you ever gotten flowers from a significant other? Oh, wow.  Not a significant other, but from people I was sort of with. Have you ever been cheated on? I guess, if you want to consider him a real boyfriend lol. What would happen if you found out you were being cheated on right now? No one can cheat on me since no one is going out with me lol. Are you an outgoing person, or are you more reserved? I seem outgoing, but I’m actually really reserved. What is your favorite sexual act? Erm, I’m not at all a sexual person, but okay. Have you ever been in a relationship that was going great, and then suddenly somethin...