Mom, God Must Have Spent A Little More Time On You

 When I think of my mom, I can’t help but feel overwhelmed with gratitude. Over the years, I’ve seen her grow, suffer, and endure, and I can confidently say that God has spent a little more time on her. Every time I hear songs like "God Must Have Spent A Little More Time On You" by *N Sync, "A Song for Mama" by Boyz II Men, or "Dear Mama" by Tupac, tears well up in my eyes. These songs remind me of everything she’s done for me, my brother, and my sister. They remind me of her sacrifices, her resilience, and her deep, unwavering love.

My mom became a mother at just 17. Still a teenager, she was thrust into a world where she had to navigate not only her own trauma from her parents and relatives but also the struggles of raising a child. Her childhood wasn’t a story of rainbows and sunshine; it was marked by pain, instability, and heartache. Despite it all, she pressed on, trying to find her way through a series of relationships, hoping that someone would come along who could truly take care of her. But no one ever did—not in the way she needed. Eventually, she realized that she was stronger on her own, that she didn’t need a partner who couldn’t love her children the way she did. And so, she chose us. She chose her children over any relationship, and for that, I’ll be forever grateful.

Growing up, I saw how fiercely my mom fought for us. She made countless sacrifices—physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. She poured everything she had into us, making us her world. She stuck by us through thick and thin, even when it meant going against the grain or standing up to others. She’d discipline us when we needed it, but behind our backs, she always had our best interests at heart. She taught us to be kind, even when the world was cruel to her. Even when life handed her nothing but struggles, she instilled in us the values of compassion and goodness.

One of the things I admire most about my mom is her resourcefulness. She’s what we call madiskarte—clever, quick-witted, always finding ways to make things work. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without her influence. She raised me to be strong, to be independent, and to stand on my own two feet. She showed me what resilience looks like, not just in words but in her actions, in the way she carried herself through life’s battles.

But like all people, my mom isn’t without her flaws. She has a loud voice, a product of growing up in a household where empathy and expressions of love weren’t part of the daily conversation. Saying “I love you” wasn’t something she was taught to do, but I know it’s there in her heart. She may not say it often, but she shows it in other ways—in her actions, her sacrifices, and her unwavering support.

As the eldest daughter, my mom has always felt a deep responsibility to care for her parents and siblings. I know there are regrets that weigh on her heart, particularly when it comes to my grandfather. Before he passed away, she wasn’t able to give back to him the way she wanted to. She was struggling with her own life, trying to keep her head above water, and I know that missed opportunity is something she carries with her. But she made up for it with my grandmother. She took care of her, spent time with her, and showed her the love and care she couldn’t always give before.

When it comes to her sisters, my mom’s love is boundless. Even though there are scars from their shared past—pain and history that sometimes make it hard for them to fully reciprocate her love—she never stops caring. She loves them fiercely, endlessly, just like she loves us, her children.

As a mother, my mom has spent her life trying to make up for the things she missed, trying to fill the gaps that my father left behind. She’s done her best to understand each of us—me, my brother, and my sister. And she gives everything she has for us, even when it means there’s nothing left for herself. I’ve seen her pour every ounce of her energy into making sure we’re okay, making sure we have what we need. She’s carried burdens we’ll never fully understand, and she’s done it with a strength that leaves me in awe.

I’ll never forget the prayers I used to say, asking God to send someone into her life who could love her the way she deserves. And then, my stepdad came along. When she married him, I was overjoyed, not just for her, but for him too. He’s the kind of partner who loves her, who sees her, who values her. I’m happy because she finally has someone who treats her the way she’s always deserved to be treated.

My mom’s journey hasn’t been easy. It’s been filled with pain, trauma, and sacrifice. But through it all, she’s grown. She’s become this incredible woman who, despite everything, continues to love deeply, fiercely, and without hesitation. Her story is a testament to the fact that even the most broken hearts can find healing, and even the most shattered lives can be rebuilt with love and resilience.

Looking back, I see how much my mom has taught me—not just about strength, but about grace. She’s shown me that it’s okay to be vulnerable, that it’s okay to have flaws, and that sometimes, the hardest battles are the ones we fight within ourselves. She’s taught me that love isn’t just about saying the right words, but about showing up, day after day, even when it’s hard. And most importantly, she’s shown me that no matter how dark things get, there’s always a way forward.

So to my mom, and to all the moms out there who are fighting their own battles, know this: Your sacrifices don’t go unnoticed. Your strength doesn’t go unappreciated. And your love—whether spoken or unspoken—shines through in everything you do. Thank you, Mom, for being the heart and soul of our family. I love you more than words could ever express.